Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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