Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
