i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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