Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
