My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
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