I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
The power of my boobs compel you
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
there is glitter all over my balls
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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