okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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