I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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