He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
