jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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