new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
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