No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
