Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
