ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I've blown a few things in my day
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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