He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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