Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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