i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
