I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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