Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
