She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
