but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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