just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
