just come out here and I will go home with you...
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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