party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize