let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize