Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
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I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize