First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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