I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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