Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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