i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
