West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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