I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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