My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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