And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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