You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Congratulations! We have a period
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
