Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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