Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
