First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
My vagina just clenched in fear
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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