So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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