I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
