We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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