So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Randomize
