You really coming over, don't trick.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
