He is such a slut. More and more my type.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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