I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
