coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
