i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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