Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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