big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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