There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
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at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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