so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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